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제목 Making sentences using expressions I learned from the previous class 등록일 2023-05-03
내용 I am going to write down sad story about my closed colleague. It happened to her a few months ago.
She came to me at lunch time and was like "are you ready to listen to my sad story?. I think It doesn't make sense."
It is that she has been transferred on January second of this year. She wasn't informed to move to a different department in advance, so she was bewildered and pretty surprised. Unfortunately, there were no choices and any other options to help her.
Finally, she didn't decline to his suggestion and accepted it. But she work well these days.
담당강사 Neiz 등록일 2023-05-03
첨삭 내용

I am going to write down a sad story about my closed close colleague. It happened to her a few months ago.
She came to me at lunch time and was like "are you ready to listen to my sad story?. I think It doesn't make sense."
It is because that she has had been transferred on January 2nd of this year. She wasn't informed to move to a different department in advance, so she was bewildered and pretty surprised. Unfortunately, there were no choices and or any other options to help her. Finally, she didn't decline to his suggestion and accepted it. But she works well these days.

 

REVISED:

I am going to write down a sad story about my close colleague. It happened to her a few months ago.
She came to me at lunch time and was like "are you ready to listen to my sad story?. I think It doesn't make sense."
It is becaus she had been transferred on January 2nd of this year. She wasn't informed to move to a different department in advance, so she was bewildered and pretty surprised. Unfortunately, there were no choices or any other options to help her. Finally, she didn't decline his suggestion and accepted it. But she works well these days.

 

 

Hi Tony, 

Thanks for writing this and you're able to use very well the expressions we've mentioned from the previous class, particularly the word "bewildered". There were only few corrections noticed which is impressive. Keep doing your best and keep that confidence.

 

Teacher Neiz

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