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| 제목 | School Systm Difference between U.S and Korea | 등록일 | 2024-08-08 |
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| 내용 | There are a few differences of school system between United States and Korea. The biggest one of the differences is the time students spend in schools, while U.S students attend only designated time of about 6 to 8 hours, Korean students attend about 12 to 14 hours of the time, which includes external program outside the school for the concentrated studying. Unlike U.S students who wear as they want, as long as it adheres to schools' dress code, Korean students have to wear sort of homogeneous school uniforms. And the relation of the teachers, students and parents are also different. |
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| 담당강사 | Jace2usa | 등록일 | 2024-08-08 |
| 첨삭 내용 | There are a few differences of school system between United States and Korea. The biggest one of the differences is the time students spend in schools, while U.S students attend only designated time of about 6 to 8 hours, Korean students attend about 12 to 14 hours of the time, which includes external program outside the school for the concentrated studying. Unlike U.S students who wear as they want, as long as it adheres to schools' dress code, Korean students have to wear sort of homogeneous school uniforms. And the relation of the teachers, students and parents are also different. The sentence provided has several grammatical and stylistic issues. I'll break down the sentence and offer insights: ### Issues and Insights: 1. **"differences of school system"** - **Correction:** "differences in the school system." - **Reason:** The phrase should be "differences in" rather than "differences of." Also, "school system" should be plural since you’re comparing two systems. 2. **"between United States and Korea"** - **Correction:** "between the United States and Korea." - **Reason:** "United States" requires the definite article "the." 3. **"The biggest one of the differences"** - **Correction:** "The biggest difference." - **Reason:** "The biggest difference" is more concise and correct. "One of the differences" is redundant here. 4. **"designated time of about 6 to 8 hours"** - **Correction:** "a designated time of about 6 to 8 hours." - **Reason:** Adding the article "a" makes the phrase grammatically correct. 5. **"Korean students attend about 12 to 14 hours of the time"** - **Correction:** "Korean students attend school for about 12 to 14 hours." - **Reason:** The phrase "of the time" is awkward and unnecessary. "Attend school for" is clearer. 6. **"external program outside the school for the concentrated studying"** - **Correction:** "external programs outside of school for concentrated studying." - **Reason:** "External program" should be plural, and "the" before "concentrated studying" is unnecessary. Also, "outside of" is more natural. 7. **"wear as they want"** - **Correction:** "wear what they want." - **Reason:** "Wear what they want" is the correct expression. 8. **"as long as it adheres to schools' dress code"** - **Correction:** "as long as it adheres to the school's dress code." - **Reason:** "School's" should be singular because "it" refers to the dress code of an individual school, not multiple schools. 9. **"Korean students have to wear sort of homogeneous school uniforms"** - **Correction:** "Korean students have to wear similar school uniforms." - **Reason:** "Sort of homogeneous" is informal and awkward. "Similar" is a more straightforward word choice. 10. **"the relation of the teachers, students and parents are also different"** - **Correction:** "The relationships between teachers, students, and parents are also different." - **Reason:** "Relation" should be plural ("relationships"), and "between" is the correct preposition when discussing relationships among more than two groups. ### Revised Sentence: There are a few differences in the school systems between the United States and Korea. The biggest difference is the amount of time students spend in school: while U.S. students attend for about 6 to 8 hours, Korean students spend about 12 to 14 hours, which includes external programs outside of school for concentrated studying. Unlike U.S. students, who can wear what they want as long as it adheres to the school's dress code, Korean students have to wear similar school uniforms. The relationships between teachers, students, and parents are also different. This revision corrects grammatical issues, improves clarity, and ensures that the ideas flow more smoothly. |
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