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제목 | Hollywood Remakes | 등록일 | 2024-09-19 |
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내용 | I agree with Hollywood Remakes and Reboots because people are familiar with the existing stories and newly updated plot and technology are fresh changes for viewers who are already hooked by the new advertisements. Of course there are Pros and Cons in this market.: Pros is that the new updated story has higher possibility to take the attention of the audience again and Cons is that there is still some possibility of not predicted failure in the market, giving a boring story to those who have been waiting for new films and dramas. |
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담당강사 | Jace2usa | 등록일 | 2024-09-30 |
첨삭 내용 | I agree with Hollywood Remakes and Reboots because people are familiar with the existing stories and newly updated plot and technology are fresh changes for viewers who are already hooked by the new advertisements. Of course there are Pros and Cons in this market.: Pros is that the new updated story has higher possibility to take the attention of the audience again and Cons is that there is still some possibility of not predicted failure in the market, giving a boring story to those who have been waiting for new films and dramas. Here’s the corrected version of your sentence, along with insights on what was wrong: --- Corrected Version: I agree with Hollywood remakes and reboots because people are familiar with the existing stories, and the newly updated plot and technology offer fresh changes for viewers who are already engaged by the advertisements. Of course, there are pros and cons in this market. The pro is that the updated story has a higher possibility of capturing the audience’s attention again. The con is that there is still a possibility of an unpredicted failure in the market, resulting in a boring story for those who have been eagerly awaiting new films and dramas. --- Insights: 1. Capitalization: "Pros" and "Cons" should not be capitalized in the middle of a sentence. "Hollywood" and "Remakes" were capitalized correctly, but "reboots" should also follow suit for consistency. Avoid over-capitalizing words like "Pros" and "Cons" unless they start a sentence. 2. Grammar and Sentence Structure: The sentence starting with "because people are familiar..." was a run-on sentence. Breaking it down and adding a comma before "and the newly updated..." improves readability. "Pros is" should be corrected to "The pro is," as "pros" is plural but "is" is singular. “Possibility to take the attention of” was awkward phrasing. It should be “possibility of capturing the attention of” for smoother language. “Not predicted failure” should be rephrased to “unpredicted failure” for clarity and conciseness. 3. Punctuation: A comma is needed before "and newly updated plot and technology" to properly link the clauses. "Of course, there are pros and cons in this market" needs a comma after "Of course" to set off the introductory phrase. 4. Word Choice: "Hooked by the new advertisements" was changed to "engaged by the advertisements" to sound more formal and precise in tone. "Possibility to take" is not the best construction. "Possibility of capturing" better fits the intended meaning. These changes will make the sentence clearer, more formal, and grammatically correct. |